“Tula Ng Pagsuko”

Marunong akong magsulat kaya ko rin tumula. Pero ang nawala sa’kin ay yung mga salita- salitang pwede kong ilarawan ang aking nararamdaman.

Pero sige, pipilitin kong isulat ang lahat.

Nandito ako ngayon, nakaupo sa aming bahay- hindi makatulog.

Wala rin akong makausap dahil himbing na ang lahat.

Walang may alam kung gaano kagulo ang bawat sitwasyon sa aking isip.

Walang nakakaintindi, walang nakakabatid.

Isang araw, aking napagtanto.. ano ba ‘tong nangyayari.. lagi nalang sakit!

Hindi ko lubos maisip ang ‘yong nais.

Diba nga’t sinabi ko na ikaw lang at wala ng iba?

Paulit ulit ko yan pinatunayan pero bakit ganyan ang ‘yong pag-iisip?

Sa loob ng ilang taon..hindi pa ba sapat?

Ni tiwala…bakit wala ka?

Ako’y napaisip, takot ka nga ba na baka ako’y mawala? O baka hindi mo lang makalimutan ang ‘yong kasalanan!?

Kasalanan mong pilit kong sinantabi at pilit kong tinanggap.

Ilang araw, buwan, taon ang nakalipas..ika’y napatawad.

Ngunit bakit binabalik mo sa’kin ang ‘yong nagawa!?

Wala kang pruweba! Wala kang ebidensya!

Kulang nalang..ako’y magmakaawa.

Alam ng Diyos kung gaano ako katapat! Wala! Wala! Puro ka nalang hinala!

Nakakasakal ka na…alam mo ba?

Gusto kong magalit! Gusto kong umiyak!.

Gusto ko nang magising sa inaakala kong paraiso na ‘yong dala- paraisong ang nadarama’y puro lamang saya.

Sa mahigit limang taon wala akong itinago.

Ikaw ang nakakaalam ng aking kasiyahan, ng aking kalungkutan at ng aking kasawian maging ang aking kabaliwan.

Kaya ako’y nagtataka bakit ganyan ka?

Masakit marinig ang ‘yong katagang wala kang tiwala- tiwalang binigay ko sa’yo ngunit iyong sinira.

Kung anong kasalanan ang ‘yong nagawa’y hindi ko yun kaya!

Diba nga’t sa kabila ng lahat minahal kita ng buo?

Pagmamahal na lubos lubos at walang duda.

Dapat nga magpasalamat ka, sapagkat minahal parin kita kahit hindi ka karapatdapat!

Ano pa bang kulang? Ano pa bang kailangan gawin upang tumigil ka sa iyong pagdududa?

Nakakainis dahil sobra na ang sakit- sakit na dulot ng ‘yong sobrang pagmamahal.

Uulitin ko, nakakasakal ka na sa simpleng salita!

Mahaba ang aking pasensya pero hindi mahabang mahaba.

Nakakasawa na! nakakapanlumo!

Masakit man sabihin pero ayoko na.

Pagbabago sa puso’y di na maitatanggi.

Pati ang mga tao sa paligid ko’y humusga.

Marahil tama nga sila.. na ang ikaw at ako’y kailangan ng pahinga.

At sa gayon ay ating mapagtanto, kung tayo nga ang siyang itinakda.

Mahal kita at paulit ulit ko yan patutunayan.

Subalit, gusto ko mang magpatuloy- hindi na mapipigilan pa.

Ayoko na…tama na- ang puso ko ay sumuko na.

Thank you for reading.

Till then,

Al_Yolly 💞

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“Written Poems: Trekking & Elegy of Cynical”

“Trekking”

Up the sloppy trail,
I counted my breath.
And in every step
moving forward,
I leave a piece of me
for you to keep.
As the distance
between us lengthen,
the tears that have fallen
were drowned by the
harsh wind.
There on the peak
it was silent.
Finally!
I can be nothing

_______________

“Elegy of Cynical”

Maybe it was faux
And sweetest it felt for a broken doll
Yet ー a bitterest in the
truest that was buried

Waiting. .no doubt from the pain,
carved on another disaster

Nuh! Must this happen? And afraid your words shan’t leave me
It won’t. .beloved, I’m afraid it won’t
Why, death don’t deserve your soul
If tis’ punishment, then my word I deserve all

Of fear of telling, of fear of hurting, all, I deserve all. .

Thank you for reading. Let me know your thoughts about these two poems by commenting below.

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤

“My Favorite Poems From Lang Leav”

Hi! So today, I will be sharing my favorite Lang Leav poems. Perhaps, all of you are already familiar with this author but for those who do not know her (if there is) – she’s an international bestselling author and her books continue to top bestsellers chart in bookstore world wide. She is residing in New Zealand with her partner and fellow author Michael Faudet.

I am not familiar with her back then until I saw her on instagram being dubbed as social media sensation and I was not really expecting to like her books so much because I can relate to everything she writes. Now, I am a die hard fan of her and I’ll definitely be having more of her books very soon.

I don’t know but every time I see her books, I am just so excited to buy them. Maybe that’s how I love her. 🤣

Anyway, here are my top ten favorite poems by Lang Leav.

1. Self Love
2. To Myself Ten Years Ago

3. Selfless
4. All This Love
5. For The World

6. In Two Parts

7. Until It’s Gone

8. All There Was

9. He

10. Thoughts On Letting Go

That’s all for today. Hope you enjoyed reading all the poems.

What is your favorite poem from Lang Leav that is not included here? Let me know by commenting below.

 

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤

“To the Boy Who Warms my Heart”

From the day we first met, I knew it was love.

A love so precious, a love so true.

You stole my heart with your radiant smile.

How you have made me feel that way in such a short while.

It’s a question I asked myself, then I just smile.

You were so good treating me like a star.

Then you said you love me, my eyes were in tears.

It was 16 then, when I said yes.

You were so happy and so was I.

Starting that day, I feel complete.

You’re always there, to cheer me up.

And make me smile, when I am sad.

You gave me your heart, and taught me to trust.

You treat me as if, I’m the only girl around.

You make me feel important, and never let me down.

You cleared all my doubts, and put them in peace.

I feel so lucky that I have you in my life.

And for the first time ever, it was more than just lust.

But I sometimes wonder, where have you been!?

Why only now? Why not before?

But anyhow, I’m still thankful.

And I know for sure, you’re not the same.

To those who hurt, and broke my heart.

And I can say, you’re the best.

You’re the one, that I can’t loss. 💕

Thank you for reading.

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤

“To That Broken Hearted Girl”

I hope you are doing fine today. I know you are not, but thanks for trying.

You haven’t really smiled genuinely for the longest time. I missed that. I missed your vibe. I missed your chuckling laughter. I missed the old you.
I know right now it has not sink in yet.

You are still thinking that he will come back.

That he is just playing with you.

That everything will be fine.

That you just hope that you can wake up anytime soon from a nightmare.
You have cried in silence because no one dared to ask you if how your day went.

Behind those laughs, hides too much pain and anxiety.

You wanted to break your silence, but no one seems to understand. No one seems to listen.

You have questioned your worth. You have a lot of “what ifs”.

There are a lot of unanswered questions in your mind right now.

You just wanted a clear answer why it ended too soon.

You cannot sleep well.

You are too tired of crying.

You have been so numb. You have become so emotionless.
But baby girl, cheer up!

You do not deserve to be treated like that. No one deserves to make you feel like you are never enough.

No one has the right to make you feel empty.

No one has the right to change you, just for the relationship to work.

No one has the right to control you.
It will be a tough journey to get over him, but you will be fine.

It is really difficult to start and that is true. What you need right now is to slowly pick up the pieces of your self.

Slowly gain confidence to face the world. Slowly believe in yourself that you deserve someone better.

You deserve someone who will accept your imperfections.

You might not be okay right now , but you will be at the right time.

You will soon reach that point that you will just laugh so hard as to why you mourn so much over someone who without a second thought does not deserve you.

Smile, it makes you even more beautiful. 💕

Disclaimer: This is not my own composition. All credit goes to Neil Jed Castro.👏👏

Thank you for reading!

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤

“A Special Love- Nurtured Yet Torn”

It all started so well when we were young

A perfect time, a perfect match

A perfect story, a love sublime

I met your gaze tantalizing blink

Dazed by your wit, dulcet voice so sweet

The warmth of your hands around my waist

We hugged all night and seem not to care

Then distance feel in between- it was ruined!

I gave in and gave my all

Everything- even my soul

Now, I’m alone in the darkroom of toil

Teary eyed as you were my world

You were my felicity and now a tainted glass

Our love became hopeless and then became a trash

Fear of losing you- torments in a dash

The smiles, the lies- agony of a lass!

This excruciating pain, again and again!

Still many WHY’S, how this had been?

Me? Or you’re just weak as the broken string!?

Plans together- shattered and forgotten!

To hold on still? or let go then?

A special love, nurtured yet torn- once magical, now ruined!

But love is love when endures to stand

Despite a storm that shakes and blasts

It doesn’t rattle when troubles strike

For love is kind, forgiving and right

And yet still, would there be hope!?

Would there be hope!?

Thank you for reading!

Till then,

Al_Yolly ♥

“The way GOD made me”

I’m faced with a lot of challenges but I’m able to deal with it

However, I can’t seem to overcome this feeling of being understimated and belittled

And the ones I know that supposed to boost my confidence and uplift my spirit are the ones who starting to turn their back on me and question my abilities

So I felt like some people are happy to bring me down

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

I just continued doing good things for myself with a smile on my face

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE BEING HAPPY

And sometimes they seem to misunderstood and forget that I’m no manipulated machine

So sometimes, I want to look on the mirror and realize that I’m nothing

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

That they’re waiting for me to make mistakes and continously misjudge me

And when something good happened to me, they still judge me

So what’s the point of showing good things to people who step on my confidence just to boost their own!?

SAY ALL YOU WANT BUT I JUST DON’T CARE ANYMORE! 

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

Coz I only have one life to live so why would I worry about your opinions!? 

I’ve learnt that it’s better to be loved by a few people than to be liked by everyone

And the older I get, the less I care 

So I’m going to be happy no matter what anyone says

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

 And for a long time, I’ve been hated by so many

But I’ve been so gentle and meek

And I have kept my mouth shut, my ideas concealed in the scrutinizing eyes of everyone

Hoping that they will open their eyes and realize that what they see is actually THE WAY GOD MADE ME

P.S, The photo above was taken 2 years ago (2014), So so skinny. Hehehe ☺☺😉

“I don’t want to be that GIRL”

I always dreamt of us to be a perfect couple which everyone will adore.

However, I don’t want to be the because of all your whys.

  I don’t want to be one of your priorities all the time because I am in need of dire attention.

 I don’t want to be that girl who would let you notice my tantrums when you can’t see or call me.

 I don’t want to be that girl who stops you from doing something because I am in need of someone that I can talk to.

I don’t want to be that girl who controls you with all your actions.

I don’t want to be that girl who blame you when problem arises.

I don’t want to be that girl who would be the reason of your tears.

I don’t want to be that girl who would be the reason of your sleepless nights.

I don’t want to be that girl who keeps on hindering you with all the things that makes you really happy.

I don’t want to be that girl who wouldn’t allow you to be a man.

I don’t want to be that girl who stops you from becoming a person that you really want to be.

No! I don’t want to be that kind of girl!..

But I just want to be the girl who’s there with you as you go through along the many chapters of your life.

The girl who will support you with all your plans.

And the reason why you keep on striving.

The girl who has a broad understanding with everything about you.

The girl who would be seeing you beaming with all the happiness that you deserve.

The girl who gives you all your freedom, so you will always love.

The girl who is your inspiration.

And the girl who is your strength.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

THANK YOU FOR READING. XOXO ❤💋

L..O..V..E

L, is for the love and laughter, you’re giving to me everyday just to brighten my day

O, is for the overflowing love that I never felt from them, so you’re the one I want to keep

V, is for the voice you have, to cheer me up when I’m feeling down

E, is for everything you’ve done, you’ve sacrificed just to prove that you’re love is true

“After All”

Webster's Dictionary define
 POETRY as:

A literary work in which special intensity is given to the expression of feelings and ideas by the use of distinctive style and rhythm ; poems collectively or as genre of literature.

Okey, I was so inspired with all the bloggers poem that I’ve been reading these past two weeks. I am not an expert when it comes to poetry but I still tried to composed my own poem. Here it is, I present to you guys my first composition here on my blog. COMMENTS and CORRECTIONS are required so I could improve. Thank you ☺☺☺

 

• There are times
• Almost many times
• I recall my past
• And regret that past

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• Those years that gone
• I can’t deny
• The things I’ve done
• That broke their trust

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• They called me hard headed
• They called me insane
• They called me a brat
• And they were mad

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• They gave their love
• They did their part
• To provide my needs
• That I always asked

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• But what I did
• Was to hurt them much
• My bad! My bad!
• Oh what a SHAME!

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• And today, I’ve changed
• And changed a lot
• Doing the right things
• Because of God

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• He made me nice
• He gave me light
• He gave me knowledge
• To change my past

﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※﹏﹏﹏※

• Oh God! My God!
• I thank you God
• You showed me the right path so I could start
• Coz “after all” I’ve learned a lot