“DEAR PEOPLE: Please Stop Forcing Marriage On Me”

Don’t rush anything. When the time is right, it will happen. ~ Unknown

Last Monday, we were heading to Baguio when I saw this group of “kailyan” in Poblacion, Sagada. They were telling me in Kankanaey…”ay inmali ka ubpay, dat into pay insaam abes is babaro? Kaanu ka pay abes ay makiasawa ta sayang adi nan pintas mo.. Etc. Etc…

Note: Kankanaey is a language used by the Cordillerans particularly people from the Mountain Province and the province of Benguet.

Back, I have heard those words for like a million times already and I’m so so so sick of it!

Dear People,

I have always been a big fan of marriage so this clearly means that of course, I want to get married. All of us want to get married.

Fyi, I have always been dreaming of having a “simple” Igorot wedding one of these days.

But to tell you, I have attended several wedding ceremonies in the past twenty something years and even admired those beautiful brides, their beautiful long white gowns but…I NEVER WANTED TO BECOME THEM YET!

People..I’m fed up of being told how once I turn 28, 29, and hitting the big oh so scary age 3-0.

What is so scary with 30 anyway?

Will I become unsightly if I hit that age?

Perhaps, you may think that I will end up like those who never got married but I won’t people, I won’t!

You may think as well that I’m picky but I’m not.

I know mostly of you got married in an early age.

And this is probably going to sound awful but I’m so sorry if I offend… some of you even got married repeatedly but my parents brought me up different.

I vividly remember a phone conversation I had with my mom – “there’s no reason to hurry, get married at the right time”.

Yes! I am not growing any younger but it’s all about getting ready and I believe, that’s what anybody should think.

I’m realizing more and more while writing this article that perhaps, a lot of people got married probably because of lust, boredom, survival, safety, they felt like they were at the marriageable age, comfort, society demand etc. etc. And they were like, regretting it in the end.

Hence, I should first focus on all the good things I can and should be doing for myself before saying, “ I DO”.

I am writing this to tell you people that marriage is something I would never want to compromise.

Author’s Note:

Marriage is not a game, it’s a lifelong commitment. So even though the people around you are telling that you must get married as soon as possible, never ever allow their toxic beliefs to be projected onto you.

To be continued……

Thank you for reading.

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤


“Losing and Grieving For My Dog”

Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.” — Anatole France

Years ago, I was having coffee at one of my favourite coffee shops in Baguio when I saw a girl expressing her anger towards the guy who stole her dog. She was crying, begging him to give back her dog. You know what I said? “It was just a dog!”.

(c) Pinterest

For some reason, I thought of that girl at exactly 6pm this past Tuesday. Yeah right! You will never really understand someone’s pain until you are the one feeling it. Yes, I’ve never understood that girl until now that I lost my dog.

Macky, one of the very special dogs in my life. A baby boy who had been a member of the family for one year and seven months has finally passed away after three weeks of struggling from his illness. He developed a tumor that made using his hind legs difficult so he didn’t have a lot of energy these past few weeks.

He had been with me through the ups and downs in life and even helped me cope with my other losses. He was all I wanted to be around when I was sad because he never failed in letting me know that even when it was hard, even when he was sleepy, he was still there for me. He provided me with daily opportunities to show his love and care. Man! I miss my macky! 😥

To some, this may sound foolish but I swear, the pain of losing him is so suffocating. I felt that the important part of my life have passed with him until last Wednesday, I came home and looked at the spot where he would usually be waiting. I called his name with the balmy notion that he’d appear barking while wagging his long white tail. But of course, it was just another sore reminder that he was really gone. It was just so heavy to let go of someone so sweet, so precious, and so attached to me.

Now, it is just me blistering around this quite house with nothing and no one to care for. Thinking that perhaps, it’s really a sad fact of life that dogs just don’t live as long as human do.

I knew I would get another dog after a months or even a years but a beloved dog can truly never be replaced.

P. S, Losing a pet can be as difficult as losing a human family member and this may seem silly to some but to those who have owned and lost a pet, you know what I’m feeling right now.

To be continued…

Thank you for reading.

Till then,

Al_Yolly ❤