And EVERYTHING ELSE

“I Just Don’t Want To Care Anymore” 

​I need to get back to my passionate, well-driven and valiant old self. 

The one that was caged in the expectations, assessments and boundaries of the people surrounding me 😊

 Cause for a long time I’ve been so gentle and meek.

 I have kept my mouth shut, my ideas at bay and my feelings concealed in the scrutinizing eyes of everyone.

 I just continued doing what is expected of me with a smile plastered on my face.

 It felt unreal most of the time because it felt like an act, just to make someone comfortable.

 Don’t get me wrong I love being happy but sometimes you seem to forget that I’m no manipulated machine, I’m a human capable of being broken and hurt 😔

Yes, I know I have chosen a path.

 It is not composed of unicorns and bright days in every single situation.

 I’m faced with a lot of challenges but I’m still able to deal with it.

 But I can’t seem to overcome this feeling of being underestimated, undervalued and belittled. 

That the ones I know I can count on are the ones whose starting to question my abilities and skills and worst, 

I felt like some people are trying to bring me down 😞

I may have be at fault for not standing up for myself.

 But is it so wrong to just feel calm in a tense and pressured situation?

 To feel powerless on occasions where I feel that I’m not needed.

 That my opinions don’t matter. 

That they’re waiting for me to make a mistake and continuously misjudge me!

 Yet.. did they hear any complaints from me? none!

 And when I do better than them, they still judge me!

 So what’s the point of pleasing people who step on my confidence just to boost their own?

 Say all you want but I just don’t want to care anymore! 😉 

To be continued…..

P.s. My featured photo was grabbed from google. Credit to the owner! 

Thank you for reading. 

Till then, 

Al_Yolly ❤

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