I need to get back to my passionate, well-driven and valiant old self.
The one that was caged in the expectations, assessments and boundaries of the people surrounding me 😊
Cause for a long time I’ve been so gentle and meek.
I have kept my mouth shut, my ideas at bay and my feelings concealed in the scrutinizing eyes of everyone.
I just continued doing what is expected of me with a smile plastered on my face.
It felt unreal most of the time because it felt like an act, just to make someone comfortable.
Don’t get me wrong I love being happy but sometimes you seem to forget that I’m no manipulated machine, I’m a human capable of being broken and hurt 😔
Yes, I know I have chosen a path.
It is not composed of unicorns and bright days in every single situation.
I’m faced with a lot of challenges but I’m still able to deal with it.
But I can’t seem to overcome this feeling of being underestimated, undervalued and belittled.
That the ones I know I can count on are the ones whose starting to question my abilities and skills and worst,
I felt like some people are trying to bring me down 😞
I may have be at fault for not standing up for myself.
But is it so wrong to just feel calm in a tense and pressured situation?
To feel powerless on occasions where I feel that I’m not needed.
That my opinions don’t matter.
That they’re waiting for me to make a mistake and continuously misjudge me!
Yet.. did they hear any complaints from me? none!
And when I do better than them, they still judge me!
So what’s the point of pleasing people who step on my confidence just to boost their own?
Say all you want but I just don’t want to care anymore! 😉
To be continued…..
P.s. My featured photo was grabbed from google. Credit to the owner!
Thank you for reading.